Woke up

late for work due to the makeup sex that concluded at 3 am.

ATE TOO MUCH

Everyday has the same conclusion.

The Philipines part A.2

 

XXXXXXXXX

CARLA

Made this today:

 

hey girlz!

you want to talk about soy milk? i do.
my grandma says that we are going to get back pain from staring at the computer all day. its not my fault that our large breasts were given thanks to her strengthening gene pool.
im jealous about the wild things you did yesterday.

i stayed home and tried to swim and went around a dirty neighborhood to buy 6 mangos and five pork bbq strips.

do i miss spain?
do i miss men?
do i miss having a hot body next to me?

i wont answer that.

this soy milk is in a glass bottle and it takes 250 of my daily calories.
want to stop eating shrimp chips though.

no body gets letters anymore.
i am currently filling up a book titled ¨Us and the lonely ranger are two different vibes¨
i will send it to my most important lover with a note attached saying ¨do you think this is too much?¨

my life has come to this

SPAM > ORGASM

homeland base

PICTURES OF LATELY. CORON PHILIPPINES

We can define paradise in two different ways. But I won't be so negative with you.

Heat stroke from
Too much
Family
And too
Little
Socializing
With people
My size

i'm just going to be honest with you

i'm watching makeup tutorials on youtube and really enjoying this alone time. feel like i could be entertained all day by this. listening to funky music and trying to create a spotify playlist named 'boning.' hyper-aware of the new bun i created on the top of my head. very 'samurai' inspired.

want to put all the makeup i own on my face to create a new character on jersey shore. want to instagram a picture of it using every filter under the sun. want to hashtag it : #badgirlsclub

jk

on my bed party

i want to have a productive saturday but i can't get out of this bed. this bed feels better when you've worked all week and have tired eighty-year-old bones. even took a picture on instagram to demonstrate. i'm currently sitting in a pile of clean clothes that need to be folded but that's the last thing i want to do. putting my ponytail in awkward positions on my head. if anyone filmed this in a movie it would be funny and quirky and zooey deschanel would be the protagonist.

feeling very 'this is me and this is what you get' right now. in a 'fuck you' and 'give me all your donuts' sort of way. need to stop going on social networks because they make you more antisocial which is the opposite effect. took a picture of me holding a banana and sent it to a friend with the caption 'me eating something phallic.' this is the kind of stuff that gets me off. i laugh out loud and mean it when i say 'lol.'

a tangent on a tree

why doesn't the cable work? i'm about to lose my mind. ain't nobody got time for that.

i did something that is selfish but kind of funny.

i bought two bags of chips, one lemon lime lay's and one takis. i put the bag of takis in a black bag and hid it behind the tv. i did this so that i didn't have to share the takis ever. only takis for me. is this mean?

why does living in america make you so paranoid in life? news reports about every microscopic thing giving you cancer and gas prices rising and lady kidnapped, raped, killed? why do we hear these stories and assume it will happen to us because it happened to them? why do we fear so much?

i want the cable to work but it's taking it's sweet ol' time. acting like aunt jemima in the hood. looking like, a peanut butter and celery fan.

eating takis is like an explosion of flavor. my taste buds are committing suicide because they can't handle it. going to wash it all down with some stone IPA, do they have that in spain?

i can see old and younger versions of myself at the same time. want to say i love the present though. the present is like that awkward stage where you're growing and evolving and are learning about yourself as a human. sounds are so much louder and amplified. my brain is a pair of beats by dre. do they have those in spain?

want to have lunch with mila kunis and admire her large eyes. want to talk about video games and compare relationships and laugh at all the things we have in common.want to introduce her to takis and have her fall in love with her new favorite snack.

not sure why typing yet not stopping to continue

let's write something cool

ideas are coming out my hair at one hundred miles per minute. where is my hairspray to keep it all together? i used to live in this one house then i moved to another house and one house is more haunted than the other. i drank a beer and ate a brownie that was injected with special ingredients. infused is a better word and sounds less drug-related. anyhow. i digress. i desperately seek the enjoyment that a television would provide me but the cable box is moving at a speed of one millimeter a second. all i want for my birthday is a bag of cheetoes.

went to mac today to buy makeup and tried on one million eyeshadows and one million lipsticks. i felt bad for having the girl help me for so long but that's what she's getting paid $14 an hour to do. so i tried one million eyeshadows and said, 'okay ill take this one' and felt bad about saying 'i'll pass on the lipstick' after taking one million minutes of her time. i went up to the counter and said 'i have six containers to get the free eyeshadow" and it was apparent that i am non-jew with a jew name and jew-like qualities.

why does my mouth taste like a soccer player's butthole? i brought a banana to the room when i got home and also brought up the bag of takis. want to get the lay's but i'm too comfortable in this horizontal position.

my boobs weigh five pounds each and weigh down my lungs. they shoot into the night sky like two twin towers. the bigger the boobs, the closer to god.